The Breakdown: 7 Reasons to Stop Being Too Nice
Are you someone who constantly puts others’ needs ahead of your own? Do you find yourself saying “yes” even when you want to say “no”? If so, it’s time to stop being too nice. But what does it even mean to “be nice”? With so much talk of “being nice” and “being kind” in society, it’s obvious most people could not differentiate between the two. Thesaurus.com does a fine job of defining the similar yet distinct difference in meanings. Being kind and considerate is a noble trait, but when taken too far, it can have negative consequences. In this article, we’re going to discuss seven reasons to stop being too nice and start being more assertive.
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Nice versus Kind:
The word nice typically means a person is pleasant to be around and has good manners. A nice person is cheerful and well-mannered and says friendly things to others. Sometimes, the word nice is also used more generally to say that someone is harmless or average.
The word kind typically means a person has a giving nature and often does good deeds for others. A kind person is charitable, helpful, and eager to assist other people who are in need.
1. People could take advantage of you
When you’re too nice, people may see you as an easy target to exploit your niceness and take advantage of you. They might assume that you won’t speak up for yourself or assert your boundaries when a confrontation arises. We’ve all known people who were pushovers or a “doormat” so to speak, right? Seeing this can almost be painful to watch. This can lead to others taking advantage of you, whether it’s at work, in your personal life, or with friends and family. It’s important to set boundaries, stand up straight and stick to them, even if it means saying “no” or standing up for yourself.
2. Keeping up the nice facade can be exhausting
Trying to maintain a constant state of niceness can be exhausting and draining. Why? Because no can keep up the facade of being so nice and agreeable and pleasant all the time. This is not real life and cannot last for anyone. It takes a lot of emotional energy to always put others before yourself. It’s okay to take a break and prioritize your own needs and desires and priorities whenever you feel the need. If being too nice is something you feel is a struggle, take some time to analyze your interactions. Evaluate areas of your life that can be improved upon. Remember that you can’t pour from an empty cup. Be sure to keep plenty of water in that cup!
3. Stop being too nice: It can affect your career and relationships
If you’re too nice, you may struggle in your career and relationships. In the workplace, assertiveness is often seen as a positive trait. Consider those around you that appear successful and admired by those around them. What kind of personality attributes do they possess? If you’re not able to speak up and assert your ideas, you may miss out on important opportunities or be overlooked for promotions at pivotal moments in life. In relationships, being too nice can lead to resentment and unfulfilled needs from all parties involved. It’s important to communicate openly and assertively to build strong, healthy relationships. Speak up and say what needs to be said, even if your voice cracks or breaks. You can’t please everyone. A boss once said, “If you’re not pissing people off once in a while, then you’re not doing your job”.
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4. Others will respect and value your honesty
When you stop being too nice, you’ll find that others will respect and value your honesty. Being honest about your feelings, needs, and boundaries shows that you have integrity and respect yourself enough to speak up. Ask yourself about a time you had something on your mind in a professional or personal setting. Was there a deep-rooted need to speak honestly? Maybe you walked away and found yourself having negative self-talk because of the regret from not speaking honestly in the moment. Next time this urge to speak your truth comes up in a situation that was previously baffling, don’t hold back the honesty. This will lead to stronger, more authentic relationships and interactions.
5. Not being too nice can develop assertiveness
Assertiveness is a key skill that can be developed with time and some trial and error unfortunately. By gradually pushing yourself out of your comfort zone and asserting your wants and needs, you can improve your assertiveness. Claim your own rights and views and be self-assured in any situation or setting. This will lead to more confidence and a stronger sense of self. You may even find you begin walking with your head a little higher as you do so. Remember that assertiveness is not the same as aggression. You can be assertive while still being kind and respectful to others.
6. You could neglect your own needs and desires
When you’re being too nice, you may put others’ needs and desires ahead of your own. This can lead to neglecting your own emotional, physical and career-related needs. It’s important to prioritize yourself and your own well-being. It’s a sad but true statement to say if you don’t put your needs first, mostly no one will. If you stop being too nice, self-evaluation and reflection on your own priorities in life become easier and clearer to see. This doesn’t mean that you should never help others, rather that you should take care of yourself as well. Life is rarely black and white when it comes to decisions or refining personal behaviors, beliefs or perspectives. It is very much a gray world, and the ultimate goal is finding the middle ground. Moderation and balance in ALL THINGS are the final destination in personal growth.
7. Being too nice can negatively impact your health
Being too nice can have negative impacts on your mental and physical health. It can lead to anxiety, stress, and even depression. These mental health issues can then spiral into physical conditions such as hypertension, obesity and diabetes, just to name a few. , just to name a few. If you stop being too nice to others, caring for your own mental health and physical needs immediately takes a front row. More time and confidence to implement a workout routine, clean meal prep or a yoga schedule now becomes a priority as well. It’s important to take care of yourself and prioritize your own needs in order to maintain good health, well-being as well as a productive lifestyle.
The Wrap Up: 7 Reasons to Stop Being Too Nice
If you’re someone who is constantly putting others’ needs ahead of your own, it’s time to stop being too nice. Being assertive and standing up for yourself can lead to stronger, healthier relationships and a greater sense of self-worth. Remember that you can still be kind and respectful while asserting your boundaries and needs. By doing so, you’ll be taking an important step towards improving your life. Stop being too nice, be assertive and just keep moving forward! Give it your all in life my friends! God Bless!
Thanks so much for taking the time to read this well researched and thought-out article. Each topic has been carefully thought out and really has personal meaning to my life as a guy who’s dedicated the last 15 years to personal growth. My knowledge of what goes into the posts not only comes from time spent as a nurse working in the mental health field, but as a recovered alcohol who’s put a lot of time into 12 step study and therapy. However, these articles are only meant to be informative, motivational and inspirational. If you have any serious psychiatric or medical conditions, you should always seek out professional help as you see fit. And please share this article with someone in need of insight! Thanks, my friends & please share to social media as well! -The Good Guy
Stop Being Too Nice & Thoughts from the Author
Who loves personal development? I sure do! If you’re ready to stop being too nice then check out these articles on some of the best books out there. I’m a big fan of the Best Books for Overthinking, Best Positive Mindset Books and The Best Leadership Books of 2023! Furthermore, All I Have Are Negative Thoughts, Why You Should Stop Playing the Victim and Everyone is Struggling are powerful reads and dear to my heart. Please share these with someone on a personal growth journey. So, get out there and Expect the Best! God Bless!